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A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even...
An elderly couple, a priest, and a doctor walk into a bar. As they are sitting down and drinking, they eventually start talking about conception and...
A dad was having a conversation with his 8 year old son Little Johnny about what he would like to be when he grew up. He...
An elderly man in Oklahoma calls his son in New York and says, “I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you...
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud knocking on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door...
A little girl and a little boy were at day care one day. The girl approaches the boy and says, “Hey Johnny, want to play Mummies...
A man walked into a bar and ordered a glass of white wine. He took a sip of the wine, then tossed the remainder into the...
A couple was relating their vacation experiences to a friend. “It sounds as if you had a great time in Texas,” the friend observed. “But didn’t...
The other day I went over to a nearby Pharmacy. When I got there, I went straight to the back of the Store to where the...
A couple had been married for 40 years and he managed all of the money. He told his wife that he did not ever want her...
After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came to see a therapist. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade...
A man walks out onto a busy New York City street and happens to catch a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and...
A lawyer and a senior citizen are sitting next to each other on a long train journey. The lawyer is thinking that seniors are so dumb...
A old aunt Cora went to her doctor to see what could be done about her troublesome constipation. “It’s terrible,” she said to the doctor. “I...
The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions. “Ever have an accident?” “Nope,...
A couple were in a busy shopping centre just before Christmas. The wife suddenly noticed that her husband was missing and they both had a lot...
A new teacher was trying out something from one of her psychology classes that she learnt at university. She says to the children, “Everyone who thinks...
An elderly couple walk into a fast food restaurant. They order one hamburger, one order of fries and one drink. The old man unwraps the plain...
Wife: I heard you have a new secretary today? Husband: yes. Wife: Is she smart? Husband: yes. Wife: Is she pretty? Husband: yes. Wife: How did...
A husband and wife get up on Sunday morning. After breakfast, the wife notices that her husband isn’t dressed for church. “Why aren’t you dressed for...
