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A nun is standing outside a pub and a man comes round the corner, planning to grab an after-work bevy. The nun immediately points at him,...
A young couple were driving down the road one day, happily, deliriously in love and due to be married the next day. Suddenly, a large truck...
The teacher asks little Johnny if he knows his numbers. “Yes,” he says, “I do. My father taught me.” “Good. What comes after three.” “Four,” answers...
A cop pulls over a car full of nuns. The cop says, “Sister, the speed limit on this highway is 55 mph. Why are you going...
A little girl is sitting on her grandpa’s lap and studying the wrinkles on his old face. She gets up the nerve to rub her fingers...
A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says “Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses.” The woman answered “Well,...
A man went to the dental surgeon to have a tooth pulled. The dentist pulled out a freezing needle to numb the area. “No way! No...
A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. “Okay, Mrs. Jones, what’s the problem?” The mother says, “It’s my daughter, Debbie. She keeps getting these...
A man wanted to have make love with a woman in his office, But she belonged to someone else. One day, he got so frustrated that...
One night, a drunk comes stumbling into a bar and says to the bartender: “Drinks for all on me including you, bartender.” So the bartender follows...
A man and his young wife were in divorce court, but the custody of their children posed a problem. The mother leaped to her feet and...
Two friends were standing in a bank when a pair of robbers entered. Not only did the thieves clean out the tills, but they walked around...
A man is hired by the circus to perform a necessary but rather unpleasant task. He is asked to walk behind the elephants in the center...
The passenger tapped the cab driver on the shoulder to ask him something. The driver screamed, lost control of the car,nearly hit a bus, went up...
At a session with a marriage counselor. The wife snapped at her husband: “That’s not true! I do so enjoy lovemaking!” Then, turning to the counselor....
A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots, and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender says, “Dang, why are you drinking...
A girl walks into a grocery store and asks the stock boy if he has any nuts. The guy says, “No, ma’am.” She says, “Well, do...
Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a palm tree when one turns to the other and says, “Slim, I’m...
A husband and wife are watching, “Who Wants To Be a Millionaire,” and the husband winks and says, “Honey, let’s go upstairs…” The wife says no,...
A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told...
